


Ties That Bind

by Woodface



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, Femslash February
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-09
Updated: 2015-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-17 04:07:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3514757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Woodface/pseuds/Woodface
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lexa watches as blood trickles slowly from the cut in the pad of her index finger. The wound hardly hurts, but it will be annoying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ties That Bind

Lexa watches as blood trickles slowly from the cut in the pad of her index finger. The wound hardly hurts, but it will be annoying. Everything she does will open it up. It will turn red soon from the aggravation, and it will be a constant reminder for the days to come.

She presses her finger to the braid she sew into the lining of her chest armour and slowly drags it down. The blood colours the brown hair red, and she closes her eyes. It's gone now, everything that bound her to the life before she became _The Commander._

She rolls her shoulders, trying to get rid of the prickle there that makes her feel exposed. Four braids. Four ties. Sown beside each other in the left side of her armour. She wonders if this ritual is a weakness rather than a reminder to shield herself from those around her. Each lesson they taught her was dear, and came at a cost.

 _Her mother_ who taught her to love all and favour none. Her mother who led with an iron hand, but was considered to be just and fair. Strong when she needed to be, but loved by all save the one who put a dagger between her shoulderblades.

 _Her lover_ whose fiery braid still burns after all these years. _Her lover_ who taught her that love can be all consuming. That it can devour sense and blind you to what needs to be done. That love leaves a hole inside you which cannot be filled but by the darkest desire, and cannot be quenched by blood and fire.

 _Her mentor_ who loved selflessly and taught her that hard decisions come at a price, but that it should not stop you. That the price you pay is nothing compared to what others lose, and that which lets your people survive can only make you stronger.

And now _her shield_ , who loved unconditionally. Who would lay down his life without a single thought. He had always been there, from the moment she was born. He was at her back constantly when she picked up the title, a silent presence that she could rely on. Now others would take his place, but never fill it. It's not his betrayal that stings, his actions were pure. It's his doubt in her decision that has her reeling.

She touches each braid in turn before pulling the black fabric across them again and sewing it closed again. When the task is done, she pulls the armour on again, the cut on her finger stings when it catches on the buckles.

Love is weakness and she carries hers close to the chest as a reminder. She wonders who will take her braid and keep it close to them when all her ties are gone now.

Almost all. Despite all her reluctance, Lexa can feel the bond that's slowly forming between her and Clarke. She has naught to learn from the Sky girl who wears her emotions like a badge. It's her time to teach and Clarke is learning, but not fast enough, and Lexa does not have the room to sew in another braid in her harness. She doesn't have enough left of herself to be consumed again.


End file.
